As we return to campus this spring, I am sure people have noticed the growth of sophisticated culture as compared to the fall semester. This influx of, as the French would say, à la mode is because us worldly juniors have returned from our studies abroad. As someone who took courses in Zleptieg, Germany at Freud University’s School of Computer Science and Concrete Brutalist Architecture, I can truly say Davidson needs to revitalize its cultural milieu. The European lifestyle just makes sense, and I think we could all benefit from smoking more cigarettes at 8am before drinking black coffee from 5pm to 11pm at Nummit. The real culture shock I experienced was returning to my lovely campus and not seeing a single person wearing black and grey palette patchwork pants with a stained deep red turtleneck and thin sunglasses. Instead, as I walk the campus, all I see is the faces of people who haven’t been to 15+ small European countries and I feel pity.
While I spent my first day back at Libs performatively reading my antidisestablishmentarianism post-marxist pre-beaufont Romanian literature, I ran into an old friend and said “merci beaucoup la fontaine poisson, et ma phaque boulangerie croquet,” a very common and elementary greeting in France, I was shocked that they thought I was having a stroke. I think the students that stayed here don’t understand how life changing this was for us. We can’t just easily slip out of the culture and language that practically rebirthed us during our 3 month semester with other English speaking Americans. The bonds I formed by socializing exclusively with other Davidson students in my program through WhatsApp are truly incomprehensible to those unworldly people that have stayed behind. Prepare to look on sadly as we do our program reunion event every two weeks to reminisce on the more interesting times of our life that have passed by. Mon Dieu! You probably don’t even know what that means, it’s a pretty niche regional saying I picked up while there.
Some steps that the college can take to help ease our transition is to change the embarrassing party scene. During my ‘How to Drink Alcohol’ seminar we went to a club called the “Pink Cigarette,” where I learned some new partying techniques. This week at F each house will be playing east german soviet block techno music from the artist Sigreid Skrillonyxx while blue green lights flash and people serve lukewarm water mixed with merlot and a cigarette butt, which is all the rage in modern metropolitan areas. I was so delighted to be welcomed in with such open arms, the staff at every club and bar immediately would speak to me in English to make me feel at home. They even gave me a different price than everyone else at the bar. It was so considerate of them to give me a discount to welcome in an American (if you could even call me that anymore, I’m basically a dual citizen) traveling on a budget to dozens of countries. The Davidson social scene, including the freshman bartenders conscripted to service at an apartment at F had better show me the same level of respect and appreciation. Thank you to everyone who will be working to make us world travelers feel welcomed back as the new and totally enlightened beings that we are.
