As I enter my final semester at Davidson, I wanted to share a reflection of the Christian community I have found. To explain where I am today, it is important to look back at where I started. I became a Christian when I was 16 years old, a fact that might resonate with, shock or mean nothing to you, yet means everything to me. I decided to claim Jesus as my savior and heavenly Father soon after my family was hit with what felt like world-ending news. My brother, my childhood best friend, was arrested and given a sentence of 30 years. The circumstances of his arrest and details of his case are not my story, simply the cause of rippling effects that led me to feel broken, desperate for hope, comfort, and friendship. During this time, my mom and I went to a local church to find a way to ease the heartache. While my mom found “her” people, I still felt a large sense of isolation being the only person my age. Looking back, I recognize that God is the reason I have had such a flourishing community while here at Davidson.
I have been involved with Reformed University Fellowship (RUF) which has led me to find a strong, Christian community and shown me what it means to be a good friend and neighbor. Friendship is bearing each other’s burdens. It means answering the phone at 1 a.m. and listening to their troubling news. It means acting with love in your heart and showing others the love that Jesus has shown you. My friends have both answered and called me in the middle of the night. They have even brought me breakfast on stressful days because they knew I might forget to eat. They have shown me that friendship is sacrificial, deep, a privilege. When I say friendship is a privilege, I mean that it should be treated as an honor, not something exclusive. The hard truths, reality checks, and secrets your close friends hold for you are some of the biggest honors you could give them. We need good friends to tell us when we are wrong, hold us accountable, and be there to celebrate and mourn with us. We also need to do the same for others. We are not meant to do life alone.
That’s where Bananagrams comes in. Bananagrams has become one of my favorite ways to meet new people and spend time with close friends. To play Bananagrams, you have to dump out all the pieces and face them down. As you make words on your board, you can change them, increase their lengths, or scrap them altogether. The words on your board are ever-changing and growing with a few foundational pieces that remain the entire round, reminiscent of Christian values. Our relationships are hindered by sin, but keeping them Christ-centered lets us grow spiritually and act in service to others. Bananagrams is an easy tool to meet others where they are.
One of the biggest lessons I have learned from our campus minister is to “give the gift of going second.” That means to build a meaningful connection, you just might have to go first. Ask a classmate to get a meal. Be honest with your friends. Bake cookies for your friends. It’s time to go below surface level, you and your friends are past knowing your favorite colors. Looking back, the most fun moments happened over a good hearty meal. That’s why I love dirty dishes so much. They are an easy access point to show you care. Eating together, cleaning together, doing life together, that is what friendship is all about.
When I was considering writing this article, I asked the Perspectives Editors the goal of the section. They told me it was “a space for students to share whatever opinions they have with the rest of the school.” Knowing this, I decided to write about my experiences with religion. Knowing the pain the Church has caused many, I hope this article serves as encouragement. Encouragement to know that you are loved by Jesus. To know that Jesus heals, weeps at your pain, and has His arms wide open waiting for you. Let my story of faith and friendship be a testament to him. To that end, I also hope that it is encouragement to get to know the people around you. Invest in the strangers who will soon turn into friends and take time to appreciate the Davidson community waiting for you. It’s pretty special. I recognize the difficulty in asking you to be vulnerable, so reread the first paragraph and let me go first.
Italy Ramos ‘25 is a biology major from San Antonio, TX and can be reached for comment at [email protected].
